Conspiracy theories

Emma Hennessy (TheLorian)

Is the government hiding aliens? Did Princess Diana really die? Perhaps we are simply living in a simulation controlled by external forces? Will we ever know for sure? I asked multiple Loras College students to anonymously share conspiracy theories that they subscribe to.

 (DISCLAIMER: these are simply conspiracy theories. None of these theories have been confirmed and this article is simply for entertainment, not a valid source of news. I do not personally believe in these theories, I am simply reporting what other people have told me.)

Some people question the death of Princess Diana. One conspiracy theorist described the possibility that her death was planned. One clue to this theory is a letter that she wrote to her butler that reads, “I am sitting here at my desk today in October, longing for someone to hug me and encourage me to keep strong and hold my head high. This particular phase in my life is the most dangerous […] is planning ‘an accident’ in my car, brake failure and serious head injury in order to make the path clear for Charles to marry.” Is this evidence that the government planned her death? Another theorist claims that there is a possibility of Princess Diana still being alive. This theorist claims that Princess Diana faked her death in order to get out of the spotlight and retire quietly. 

Some theorists on campus claims that Bigfoot and mermaids exist. Bigfoot is rumored to be a giant hairy ape-like creature that roams somewhere in North America. If you search on YouTube, you can find many videos from people claiming to be witnesses to this creature called Bigfoot. As well as Bigfoot, some people also believe that mermaids exist. Many conspiracy theorists point to the journal kept by Christopher Columbus. In his journal, Columbus describes seeing three mermaids in the water. Did he mistake manatees for mermaids, or do you agree with theorists who claim that he really saw mermaids? Perhaps mermaids exist deeper down in the ocean? After all, 80 percent of the ocean remains undiscovered.

One student subscribes to the theory that Paul McCartney passed away in a car crash in 1966. According to this theory, he was replaced by an imposter who looked and sounded like him. Fans of The Beatles search for clues in backwards song lyrics, album covers, pictures, etc. John Lennon described this theory as, “The stupidest rumor I’ve ever heard.” 

One student claimed to believe in the theory that the Earth is actually flat. Flat-Earthers, people who subscribe to this theory, believe that Antartica is a vast area that surrounds the earth. Many Flat-Earthers believe that the government is hiding secrets about the shape of our planet. Many people point to the fact that the Earth doesn’t look like it has curvature. Make sure to pay close attention to the ground’s curvature (or lack of curvature) next time you fly on a plane.

As well as the government hiding the secret of the shape of the Earth, some theorists believe that the government is also hiding aliens in Area 51. Some people point to videos on YouTube claiming to see UFOs. Anyone still want to invade Area 51? Some people wonder whether we are living in a simulation. This theory suggests that our environment is being controlled by powerful external forces. Is Earth an experiment for Aliens? Another theory suggests that nothing is real, and that you are the only thing that really exists. Perhaps you are using a futuristic form of virtual reality. Maybe you are the only living thing and everyone else is being controlled by external forces who are experimenting on you. Was this article inserted into your simulation as part of a test?

Another conspiracy theorist believes that 9/11 was done by the United States Government in order to get a reason to invade the Middle East in search of oil. Some people claim that the Twin Towers were damaged by a bomb on the inside. Theorists get this idea from the videos and from former President Donald Trump, who was interviewed. Trump says, “I happen to think that they had not only a plane, but they had bombs that exploded almost simultaneously because I just can’t imagine anything being able to go through that wall.” One theorist told me that they think that airport security is another way to keep citizens controlled.

Another theorist claimed that the government is putting chemical trails (chemtrails) in the sky. One theory states that these chemtrails are used to block the sun, controlling the weather and slowing global warming. Another theory claims that these chemtrails are leaving chemicals in the air to make people more stupid and obedient to the government. Should we worry about our IQ levels?

Some conspiracy theorists believe that the government is poisoning our water. Theorists believe that the government is putting fluoride in the water to poison us. Fluoride supposedly blocks the effectiveness of the Pineal gland, which is seen by some people as a “third eye” or a “spiritual connection.” This theory led to the meme of Alex Jones saying, “I don’t like them putting chemicals in the water that turn the freaking frogs gay!”

Is this too much information for your brain? Too scary? Here’s a theory that won’t freak you out- All of the Pixar movies exist in the same universe. This theory has been accepted by a lot of fans of Pixar and Disney. 

What do you think? Is the government controlling us? Are aliens real? What really happened to Princess Diana? Will we ever know these answers for sure? Who knows! Maybe you are in a simulation and this newspaper is sent to you by alien overlords who are watching and taking note of your every move.

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